Makeup is Magic and I'm a Fucking Wizard

Hello children! On today's segment of Jane making a fool out of herself, we're going to learn how to go from this...

To this!

But in all seriousness, folks, my skin has been one of the biggest struggles for me emotionally (and physically) since I was about 12 years old. It's been bad, it's been good, it's been REALLY bad, and now it's somewhere kind of in the middle. I'm very lucky because my acne has actually cleared up. What you're seeing above is just a lot of hyperpigmentation, red marks, and scarring from many years of pimples and my inability to not pick at them. So yes, partially, the way my skin looks now is my fault. Le sigh.

Fortunately, I've been able to pick up on a lot of various techniques to help mask what I want masked and highlight what I want highlit. It's taken many years and many wrong foundation colours but I can honestly say that I legitimately know what I'm doing. 

Sort of. 

Alright, here we go.

First, let's set the mood. When I'm doing my makeup in the morning, I like to play pump up music like Taylor Swift's 1989 or Haim's Days Are Gone. Other days I listen to podcasts. Today is one of those days. I'm totally obsessed with It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, and luckily for me, Marc Maron just had Rob McElhenney on. Mood set.

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Next, get that hair out of your face. This will make your life a million times easier.

Then, get visited by a furry creature hiding between your shower curtains. Technically, this part is optional, but I highly recommend it.

First step of actual makeup application! We prime. I'm using an Hourglass Primer called Mineral Veil. It's really nice and light and keeps my makeup from sliding off after a few hours. The only downside is that the pump is super faulty and I actually have to open up the bottle to get the primer out. I put a little bit on my finger and rub it into my face, focusing on my T-Zone which is where I get oiliest. 

Not much (visible) difference yet, but this step is super important.

Now we conceal (don't feel). I'm using  NARS Radiant Creamy Concealer in Vanilla. I use the wand of the concealer and dab it onto all of my red spots. I don't rub it in or drag it along my face because that's how bacteria gets spread. I just dab, dab, dab until I look like a warrior princess.

Then I take my Sephora Pro Precision Concealer Brush #45 and dab some more. Again, I don't rub or drag the makeup because I want it where I put it and if I start dragging it, it'll leave parts of my skin unconcealed. 

Now already, that is a HUGE improvement. 

Now here comes a very important step. As someone with problematic skin, it is EXTREMELY important to keep things clean. That's why I wash my brushes after every single use. I use Sephora's The Natural: Citrus Brush Cleaner on all of my brushes.

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Now, some people will stop after concealer. Concealer is enough to calm the skin and for a lot of people, that's all they need. I, on the other hand, will now turn to my foundation. I use NARS Radiant Cream Compact Foundation in Mont Blanc with my Sephora Pro Foundation Brush #47. WE CONTINUE TO DAB PEOPLE! This gives the best coverage and you don't run the risk of creating streak lines. I have to make sure that I go all the way down my neck as I have scarring on it and it also doesn't make it seem like my face and neck are two different colours. Rookie mistake that I have made many a time. I blend it all so that my entire face and neck are ONE colour.

And then... AHH! Scary ghost lips!

By far the creepiest part of the makeup experience is putting my foundation over my lips. There is, however, a method to my madness. By creating a totally monochromatic base, I can create a distinct lip line with my lipstick that doesn't necessarily have to follow my actual lip line. It also makes my lipstick glide on my easier. 

But let's add a little bit of colour before I freak everyone out. It's blush time! I use NARS in Deep Throat (yes, yes, hilarious) with my Sephora Pro Angled Blush Brush #49. I swipe a little bit of the blush onto the brush then DAB AGAIN, MOTHERFUCKERS! This dabbing is a bit more circular in that I dab along my cheekbone. I tend not to go too heavy on the blush, just enough to make me look alive.

Finally, we powder! I'm using NARS Light Reflecting Loose Setting Powder with my Sephora Pro Flawless Brush #40. A little goes a long way with this stuff. It basically sets all of the layers of makeup that I've just put on by mattifying it but making me SUPER glowy in the best way.

Okay, LET'S GET SOME COLOUR ON THOSE HORRIFYING LIPS NOW, K? I'm using NARS Velvet Matte Lip Pencil in Cruella.

Thank God. That is soooo much better. Now usually this is where I would leave it, just throw on a bit of mascara then skiddaddle, but since I have time, we're going to do eyes next. Now just like with your face, eyelids need to be primed as well. I use NARS Smudge Proof Eyeshadow Base and it is pure magic. My eyelids get quite oily and halfway through the day without primer, my eyeshadow has slid into my crease and I look horrific. Just DAB a little bit on the eyelid and smudge it all over.

Now to apply the eyeshadow. I'm partial to Urban Decay's Naked3 Palette because it is rosy-gold awesomeness. I'm pretty terrible at eye makeup, so I usually only do about two colours at a time. This time I'm chosen to use Trick on my eyelid with the provided brush and Nooner in my crease with the other side of the provided brush.

Almost, done, I swear! Only three more steps to go! Don't fall asleep yet! Now comes eyeliner. I'm super shitty at applying eyeliner so I have to use a magnifying mirror when I do it. I'm using Stila Stay All Day Waterproof Liquid Eyeliner on my eyelid and Lancôme Le Crayon Khôl in Black Ebony for my waterline.

Oh yes, flawlessly done. 

AND THIS IS IT! THE FINAL STEP!!!! MASCARA AND WE'RE DONE PEOPLE!!!! I'm using a sample of Make Up For Ever Smoky Extravagant mascara. My trick with mascara is I will swipe up underneath my lashes but I will also swipe down on top of my lashes to get a thicker effect. I never wear mascara on my lower lashes. Don't know why, I just don't.

AND THAT IS IT MY FRIENDS. My multi-step makeup routine that I DO EVERY FREAKING DAY. No, it's not perfect, and yes my spots still sometimes show through but my self-esteem and confidence skyrockets after I put on my makeup. It doesn't change who I am fundamentally, but it changes how I feel about myself and how I henceforth present myself. Makeup is a beautiful thing, it's not a lie, it's not a trick, it's not used for anyone else but the person who's wearing it. I do this for me and me alone. It's an expression of who I am and who I want to be. I can use as much or as little as I please, I can be subtle, I can be bold, I can be anywhere in between. Makeup is magic and I'm a fucking wizard.

Later days!